Stack Those Views

Before I get into this week's Stack That Cheese, I just wanted to proudly announce that STC has reached five figures, now sporting over 10,000 views and counting. And in less than a year, too. It's a little sappy--something I try to stay away from while writing about hardcore gangsters--but I just want to thank everyone who's ever viewed my blog. Even those perverts who end up here due to an Alexis Texas search gone wrong.

The Good:

MeLo-X - GOD:WiFi

MeLo-X has just made history on Stack That Cheese! After last week's Better Off Dead from the Flatbush Zombies, MeLo-X's appearance in "The Good" column marks the first time (probably) that two residents from the same community appeared back-to-back on STC.

If that wasn't enough of a hint, MeLo-X is a rapper and producer out of Flatbush, Brooklyn, same as the Zombies. Unlike the Zombies, MeLo-X is a one-man act and manages to make some pretty complex sounds all by himself, with a little help from features and guest producers here and there.

WiFi is more like an EP than a full-length album, but that doesn't limit MeLo from showing off his range.

MeLo relies a lot on electronic sounds that sound like a mix between ASAP Rocky and Flying Lotus. 

"Rich Man" is an example of this. It starts off with a simple electronic bass line before adding some funky synths and a kick-ass drum kit.

Little Simz

MeLo doesn't just hide behind his production, either. He has a pretty great flow that fluctuates between freaky fast and just slow enough to add emphasis to his words. Plus, London-rapper Little Simz stops by to add an even more distinguishable verse. It's not too often you can find a hard-hitting British female emcee, but Little Simz is the exception and it's fantastic.

And "Finer Things" is a diverse track that goes from soothing electronic to ASAP-like hazy rap. Plus, a beautiful songstress by the name of Elle Pierre comes by for an enchanting hook.

There are some songs produced by others that keep up with the general theme of Wifi, such as "Customs," produced by  D. Bridge. The track has a quick hi-hat beat mixed with some spooky background noise that sounds like Timbaland tried his hand at producing the Luigi's Haunted Mansion music.

On "Customs," MeLo sings instead of rapping, and even though he's no Frank Ocean, he still manages to keep up and keep the song interesting.

WiFi's biggest fault is probably that it's just seven songs long, which leaves the listener aching for more. But in those seven songs, MeLo-X manages to add a large contribution to the reincarnation of the New York hip-hop scene.

The Bad:

Cash Out - Ya Feel Me?

I got lucky with this one, honestly. I was just about to head to Datpiff for a bad mixtape. It's been a pretty calm mixtape week thus far, but when I went back to Hot New Hip-Hop's home page, there was this beautifully corny mixtape cover and I knew I was saved.

Cash Out is an Atlanta rapper that clearly likes being known by an action. You might know Cash (also written as Ca$h) from his hit single "Cashin' Out," a song with a repetitive beat and dumbed down lyrics.

Unsurprisingly, Ya Feel Me?  is just more of that, except maybe a little less catchy.

Pull-Up, don't turn up

"Pull Up" is an example of that poor formula. The beat is boring, mostly consisting of Inception-like horns and heavy bass. And the lyrics are just ridiculously stupid, even in the hook. "If a nigga pay you know we bout to pull up / I've been in money since I was in Pull-Ups," raps Cash Out. Although, he deserves at least some credit for being the first rapper of all time to mention Pull-Ups.

"Movie" might be one of the better produced tracks on Ya Feel Me? With a predominately piano-based beat and a little bit of strings, "Movie" just feels more legitimate. It's still repetitive except for a bass breakdown, but by Cash Out standards, it's not bad.

That doesn't mean the lyrics are any better, though. By "Movie," Cash Out means sex tape and he mostly just sings (poorly, I might add) about threesomes and other sexual acts.

The most surprising thing about Ya Feel Me? is that it's mostly just Cash Out. There are only two features on the whole mixtape, and neither of them are important enough to mention. For someone who's worked with Wale before, you would think Cash Out could get some bigger names for his mixtape.

Ya Feel Me? is far from a good debut. For someone new on the scene, you would hope Cash Out would make better use of his 15 minutes of fame. But based on this release, it seems his 15 minutes are up.

The Re-dic-yu-lus:

Soulja Boy - 23

YES! Stack That Cheese is only a few episodes into its second season, but I still thought Soulja Boy and/or Lil B would have made an appearance by now. But I guess it's better late than never.

I probably shouldn't be admitting this, but as soon as I saw Soulja's new mixtape, I automatically penciled it in as re-dic-yu-lus. I mean, it of course turned out to be. But that says something about Soulja Boy that his mixtape being bad is as certain as death and taxes.

"Jackie Chan" has to be one of my favorite bad songs on 23. The beat is made up of some weird piano-y synths and some heavy bass. The hook is just Soulja Boy saying "Kill shit like Jackie Chan" in a way that it sounds like "kishit like Jackie Chan." And Soulja Boy even disses 2 Chainz! "Three chains on my neck, but not in my name," he says, calling out one of the most prolific rappers at the moment.

"But Xavier," you might say, "I love Jackie Chan and all, but I really hate that new Karate Kid with him in it. Is there anything on 23 that might appeal to the original Karate Kid fanboy in my heart?'

Crank this / Crank that

Well, that's a really specific question, voice inside my head. Luckily for you, there totally is. Thanks to Soulja Boy, you can now wax on and wax off in style to his song "Mr. Miyagi." Every Karate Kid fan will love hearing Soulja Boy rapping, "Tattoos on my neck / Tattoos on my chest / Riding through the hood and I feel like I'm the best" right before he goes into a hook repeating "Mr. Miyagi" and "wax on / wax off."

And just because Soulja Boy is an Oriental god, he decided to do a song called "Japanese," too. I don't even get the logic behind this song. He seems to think that enough lean can lead to "niggas talking Japanese." Is this like an epiphany thing? Like, the Holy Spirit comes to him in his lean and encourages speaking tongues? Like, what?

Honestly, "Japanese" barely even has lyrics. I don't know how to quote Soulja Boy off this track because he mostly just says "lean," "g's," "Japanese" and "jeans" a lot. With the occasional "konichiwa," of course, so you know he can indeed speak Japanese.

I truly missed Soulja Boy. Outside of Lil B, he's basically my favorite to cover. And if anyone deserves thanks for STC getting to the big 10k, it's Soulja Boy. So thanks, Soulja Boy. I'll crank that in your honor.

-X-Prime, dropping the mic for now

@XavierVeccia

The Walking Rad

The Good:

Flatbush Zombies - Better Off Dead

I've been over my fascination with mixtape covers in the selection process plenty of times. And if you know that, you understand why I selected this album.

Flatbush Zombies' mixtape cover seems like a scene straight out of a horror movie, fitting with their name and fitting with the sound they don.

As soon as you start the album with the track "Amerikkkan Pie," you know this trio is unique. A creepy beat is quickly interrupted by a mini drum solo that makes way for some angelic singing before Zombie member Meechy Darko releases an intense verse. 

He ends his verse in such a chilling fashion with the line "Ever since I blew up niggas think I got bread / So they got their hands out, they gon' get their palms read / Red from all the bloodshed." That just sets the bar high for the other two Zombies, Erick Ark Elliot and Zombie Juice, who don't fail to deliver. The song comes to an epic finale with some guitar shredding and more drums. And that's just the first track.

The Flatbush Zombies are a rap trio straight out of Flatbush, Brooklyn. The mastermind behind the spooky sound is Ark Elliot, who raps and produces, doing both insanely well.

It's hard to pinpoint their sound exactly. It seems like a combination of The Coup, Danny Brown and rock--three things I never thought I'd see together. But oh, does it work.

Any drug parade must include
Danny Brown. Fact.

Speaking of Danny Brown, the Detroit artist makes an appearance on the appropriately-titled "Drug Parade." The song features a trippy, yet spooky repetition of "Shrooms, shrooms, LSD, mescaline, a lotta weed." So, you know Danny Brown belongs on this song.

Danny Brown even manages to deliver a unique flow for the Zombies, rapping lines like "Hickeys on her titties now she want to lick shit," in a sing-song manner. It might be seen as annoying to those who aren't Danny Brown fans, but as a XXX fanatic, it hits me in all the right places.

There's also the song "Club Soda," which combines a bit of an old-school feel with the Flatbush sound. The song features six verses and just one bridge, done by Action Bronson in typical ex-chef fashion.

"Unique" is an overused term and I won't deny that I contribute to that. But in Flatbush Zombies' case, it fits. I think it's safe to say that there are not too many people out there doing what the Zombies do, and I love it.

The Bad:

Gucci Mane - Diary of a Trap God

I was doing everything I could to avoid this release. I've been over my disdain for Gucci before, so I was hoping to at least find a new artist to criticize this time around.

But every semi-major artist who released a mixtape this week just wasn't bad enough. Jae Millz had a hard-knock life vibe to R.O.T.S. Black Dave was average, but not bad on Black Bart. L.A. the Darkman had some nice lines on Paid in Full. So now I'm here. Reviewing Diary of a Trap God. Trap Goddammit.

Let's just get to this.

Lucifer, thy name is Young Thug

"Virgin" sucks. Like, a lot. You know how I said Danny Brown was borderline annoying on Better Off Dead? Well, on "Virgin," Gucci Mane has an artist by the name of Young Thug perform on a way too long bridge and a horrible last verse. He crosses the annoying line and just keeps going.

I imagine lying on my death bed, thinking about all the bad things that I've done in my life before closing my eyes for one last time. And then I see Young Thug surrounded by flames just shouting, "Baby girl ain't no virgin" at me. I'm in hell. This song is hell.

Oh, you need more? Remember Akon? Of course you do! Remember how much you loved "Smack That?" Hold on to that memory for a few more seconds. Cherish it. Breathe it in. Now let go. And listen to "Recognize."

On "Recognize," Akon sings an overly gross chorus including the line "Cause now you're all in my face, while I'm splashing all in your face / Cumming." Then Gucci Mane starts his verse, which has the quality of a radio rip rather than, oh, I don't know, the result of work in a recording studio. 

Akon should've just stayed with Andy Samberg

Then comes Young Scooter, who I'm assuming stole his name from an after-school special about rappers. He gets the privilege to end this song, which I am so grateful for. But even "Recognize" doesn't deserve to end with the line, "Now I'm shitting on these hoes like a toilet bowl."

And I haven't even gotten to the best part. I know Blogs Editor/'90s fanatic Sam will especially love this. Over all of the Waka Flockas and OJ Da Juicemans, there's one featured artist who stands above them all on Trap God. Ladies and gentlemen, Marilyn Manson.

Even Manson is shocked by this.

That's right, the Antichrist Superstar himself makes an appearance on the song "Pussy Wet." He mostly just says, "Getting pussies wet." But he also sprinkles in the occasional "panties to the side, bitch, I want to see your camel toe" and "bitch, your pussy's solid gold." I know Marilyn Manson is all about the shock, but even he should draw the line at being on a Gucci Mane song.

So, if you're keeping track at home, Gucci Mane has created a personal hell for me, destroyed Akon more than Akon could even destroy himself and become the most shocking thing Marilyn Manson has ever done.

You know what, screw it.

The Re-dic-yu-lus:

Gucci Mane - Diary of Being a Trap God

You did this to yourself, Gucci Mane! You have no one to blame but yourself!

-X-Prime, dropping the mic for now

@XavierVeccia

Season 2

Last season on Stack That Cheese: Our main character Xavier Alan Solomon Veccia was busy judging the heroes and demons of hip-hop with his mighty keyboard (which is mightier than the pen, which is mightier than the sword. So, his keyboard is pretty freaking mighty). And then Walt and Jesse got in a fight (in which Jesse dropped the word "bitch" multiple times). Oh wait, wrong show. Anyway, Stack That Cheese is back and it feels so good. Speaking of good...

The Good:

Audio Push - Come as You Are

Audio Push opens up the second season well with a great release in Come as You Are.

Audio Push is a Cali duo credited with the invention of twerking. As an expert jerker, I owe all of my life to these two.

Audio Push brings some great lyricism to Come as You Are. Take the song “Tis the Season,” which features a bass-heavy beat, but the stringed kind, not the boom-boom-bat kind. It gives it an old-school flare, made stronger with the new-school old-school mastermind Joey Bada$$'s feature on the track. Joey is a lyrical mastermind himself--one of the best in the game.

"You're a jerk / I know, girls tell me all the time"

But where Come as You Are really flourishes is in the beats accompanying Audio Push's lyrics. The self-titled first track of the album is the perfect example. The Key-Wane-produced track combines the turntable scratches and vinyl-textured aspects of old with the A$AP-like trippiness and synths of new. Not to mention some nice lines, such as, “I guess we're just outcasts / Can you smell the stank on ya.”

Alice, take a hit of this. We're listening
to Audio Push

And “Rowdy A” has an Alice in Wonderland, Dumbo-like trippy-ass Disney flare with an insanely heavy bass. The Hit-Boy-produced track is an incredibly creative song that stands out in current hip-hop.

But Audio Push can also do bangers, as shown on “Theme Song.” Once again produced by Hit Boy, “Theme Song,” has a slightly creepy piano line mixed with some great bass before breaking down (or breaking up, if you prefer) to a heavy string line. The song also features a catchy verse from TI.

Just about every song on Just as You Are has a creative beat that's perfect for both headphone and riding music. With help from artists like Wale, Lil Wayne, K. Roosevelt and James Faulteroy, Audio Push puts together a great release.

The Bad:

Project Pat - Cheez N Dope 2

If Audio Push rises with the creativity surrounding its beats, Project Pat falters with the lack of it.

When I saw Project Pat's name, I knew I had to get Cheez N Dope 2. I knew I had to check it out. For one, who the hell uses the term “cheese” anymore, let alone this horrible misspelling of it? But more importantly, the only song by Pat I had in my iTunes library was from my days before I became such a hip-hop connoisseur (flips hair). It's a ridiculously bad song called “Don't Call Me No More” featuring Three 6 Mafia.

And Project Pat doesn't disappoint in the slightest.

Most of the beats are pretty basic. With slight bass and ghetto synths, these beats could be just about any other generic rapper's mixtape.

This is shown with some of his features. The song “Gettin Cash” features Juicy J, who doesn't waste any time before promoting his album Stay Trippy. I mean, I guess a shameful promo on another rapper's track is better than his stripper-themed game on his own website. (I lied. The Stay Strippy game is absolutely

perfect.)

But "Gettin Cash" is bad enough that promoting his own album on it might not even be good for Juicy. The beat is tired and the lyrics are way too plain. I mean, with a chorus featuring the line, "I fuck bitches / I bust guns / I sip lean / I smoke down my lungs / But getting cash is what I do best," can you really expect much else?

And that bitch-fucking, lean-sipping smoker theme is found all throughout the album. From the mixtape-opening "Real Killas Don't Talk" to the Wiz Khalifa-featuring "Chiefin." Plus, Project Pat can't seem to spell a word correctly for the life of him, so that doesn't help either.

Pat even squanders a perfectly good opportunity with the song "Weed Smoke" featuring Mac Miller. Mac Miller's one of the most creative rappers in the game right now, but he's forced to rap over another same-old-same-old beat. While the track is admittedly pretty catchy, it still just wastes the talents of Mac.

I think it's safe to say that Project Pat's new mixtape is more Cheez than Dope. *drops the mic* 

The Re-dic-yu-lus:

Pyes - Pyes & Pounds

When I saw Pyes' name, the first thing I though of was pies. But then I decided that no rapper would be so stupid to name himself after pies. And then I saw the album cover with a pie on it. Now my whole world has fallen apart and I don't know what to believe anymore.

Based on my first impression, though, pecan Pyes seems pretty ridiculous. And I LOVE that.

Blackberry Pyes keeps the spelling errors going with the track "Get Enuff." Only when you listen to sweet potato Pyes, it's not surprising he can't spell. According to apple Pyes, "Bitches hate me / Police hate me," but don't worry because it's "coooo." And this is "all cuz a nigga tried so hard / ever since a nigga dropped out of school."

Dr. Seuss ain't got nothing on Pyes

Then comes the song "Wreckless," which features a ghetto-ass beat that goes on way too long (a.k.a. thirty seconds) before cherry Pyes starts rapping. And when blueberry Pyes does start rapping, he becomes a sketchy Dr. Seuss: "Got plenty racks in my safe / Got plenty racks and I pounce / Got plenty racks in my house." And his "nigga" is wreckless because he'll "eat you like wreckless". Ladies and gentleman, Theodor Pyesel.

French silk Pyes continues his horribleness throughout the album, and it's so bad it's honestly great. In fact, I want to thank sweet potato Pyes for starting off the year with a truly re-dic-yu-lus mixtape. He's the reason why I do this.

-X-Prime, dropping the mic for now

@xprime_time